Belly of the Beast


Foot in Mouth Disease

Deputy Prime Minister Patrick Faber, already no favourite of the lame duck Mr. Barrow, has been diagnosed with an intense strain of foot in mouth disease, and we are told ‘doctors’ in Cabinet are recommending that he be quarantined. According to our sources in Cabinet, Faber was on the point of tears when he was raked over the coals for saying that neither he nor Mr. Barrow knew about the corrupt write-off for the son of Cabinet Secretary Carlos Perdomo. When Faber saw the public outcry generated by that typical UDP move, he decided he could jump on the bandwagon, and he forgot that when in Cabinet, you need to take one for the team and agree with everything. Nobody could be happier than the Minister otherwise not affectionately known as porky pig, who feels that with Faber’s gaffe, his chances of being UDP leader have now increased. If there is anything porky pig knows how to do, it is taking one for the team. We are told that he regularly took one for the team at those boxers parties while hanging out with his friend Mason in that mansion on the hilltop in Belmopan.

Outrageous Corruption

We here at the Belize Times join the Public Service Union and many other right-thinking Belizeans in condemning the outrageous nepotism and corruption displayed when Cabinet decided that it was okay to forgive a debt of $40,000 to the son of a UDP Minister turned Cabinet Secretary. There are many poor Belizeans who have never been given those opportunities, and many poor Belizeans who scraped to get loans to pursue their education, and have to pay back every cent. Nobody – and we mean nobody – believes that story about nobody being able to find Joshua Perdomo. How stupid is that? We think that Cabinet Secretary Carlos Perdomo should be ashamed of himself for having his children’s names being dragged through the mud. Ain’t no way those crooked people in Cabinet didn’t know exactly what they were doing! But they miscalculated the outrage of the Belizean people. This one will not go away.

That list

How is it that nobody has been able to get a copy of the lists of all those persons whose land taxes were written off by Mr. Barrow and his Cabinet? Mr. Barrow decided, for some reason, to write off $90M in taxes for certain select persons at the same time that he burdened Belizeans with another $150M in loans. Why the write-off? Who are these lucky persons who have gotten off scot-free with not paying their land taxes? Is it true that they are all wealthy land-owners, most of them known affiliates of the UDP? Belizeans need to know. No normal Belizean can get anything from government in this country. Yet there are those privileged few who seem to get everything. It is way past time for the lame duck Prime Minister to call elections. The people are ready.

Morgue Madness

Two things: first, CEO George Gough actually exists. Many people thought he was a myth, since he has been dodging the media since he became CEO and somebody whispered the word ‘malpractice.’ Anyway so he turned up for a choreographed interview with the Government Press Office, and explained how fixing up the old morgue at the Southern Regional Hospital cost taxpayers $250,000. Just a second there buster! How in the name of God could a four-persons refrigerated unit cost $250,000? Here at the Belize Times we’ve gone on different sites offering that specialized equipment. The one bought for the morgue at the Southern Regional Hospital morgue can fit four persons. We found many that can fit six bodies, ranging in price from US$3000 – US$5000 – from recognized medical supply companies. So how do we get from BZD$10,000 to BZD$250,000? Something is very, very wrong there. Money went into somebody’s pocket, that’s for sure. The Belize Times has called all over the place trying to find out which company handled the contract for the purchase and installation of the new unit, and also the fixing of the old unit. Altogether, we are told, the units cost taxpayers hundreds of thousands of dollars – for units which cost BZD$10,000. Only under the UDP.

Pablo again

Anytime Pablo gets his hands on something, it always goes wrong. The man was on the news this week crying about how Belizeans are so doubting, and always criticize them when they are doing their best. Wipe your crocodile tears, pendejo, and come clean about the contract to Minister Montero’s brother which you planned to raid NHI funds to pay out? Come clean about this pharmaceutical company which people are always saying you’re involved in. Come clean about who got the contracts for the morgue at the Southern Regional Hospital. And maybe you can also explain to all of us how your long-time driver has suddenly become a Customs Officer, specially appointed by you. What the hell is going on? Recently two persons close to Pablo who were let go from the Zone for having chronically sticky fingers were posted as Customs Officers. The people want to know, Pablo. Stop crying and start talking.