Belly of the Beast


King Khalid

For a very long time now Khalid has been missing in Belmopan, basically nowhere to be found except for a photo op every now and then. We’ve tried to give him the benefit of the doubt, because he seems like a really nice guy. And besides, he does look a lot like Kobe, so we figure he deserves some points for that. But fun and joke and Kobe aside, somebody really needs to investigate the Mayor after pictures of his mansion went viral. There is no way that a Mayor’s salary can support that monstrosity being built in Belmopan, especially considering the fact that the Council is in chronic financial problems. We’re pretty sure that before becoming Mayor, Khalid didn’t have much going for him, so where did he get the money to build such a huge building? At the Belize Times we did our own investigation, behind the scenes, and some birds in the Mayor’s own camp say that while they don’t know exactly where he’s getting all that money, he seems to have become flush with cash around the same time that the Hilltop property in Belmopan was sold to some mysterious Asian gentlemen for a pittance. We also asked about that guy, Mr. Simplex, since nobody seems to have seen him, and we were told, unofficially, that the deal was concocted by a certain Minister who has been friends with the Mayor from way back, since they were in the phone business together. We don’t know how true it is, but it makes perfect sense to us.

Serious business

The plump Minister from Belmopan is set to officially launch his campaign for leader of the UDP soon, but you better believe that he’s more concerned about the Mason verdict right now. While Mason’s best friend has been making the rounds and posing with Ministers, we hear that Faber has been busy meeting with delegates, and we also hear that Mason’s name somehow always comes up in that conversation. And we can see why? Mason dropped a bomb on his former best-buddy when he produced a witness who confirmed that Mason gave a statement claiming that he was framed by the Minister. Now that’s serious business. Why would Mason say something like that? What kind of relationship did Mason have with Saldivar for him to feel that Saldivar framed him for a gruesome murder? And then there’s also the fact that Saldivar’s right hand, Jesus Castillo, was in that bar drinking with Mason when the head was found in Mason’s pickup. At the very least, there needs to be some serious scrutiny on our Minister of National Security, who was never questioned after the murder even though it was allegedly he who introduced Mason and Pastor Lue. There are a lot of things to make you go hmmm. And Patrick is pulling out all the stops when he’s meeting delegates. This one will go down to the wire, folks. Best believe that.

Election watch

The UDP’s leadership convention is set for February, and the Prime Minister has stated that elections will be around the end of 2020. Still, there are some shady moves taking place which suggest that elections will be long before that. Lately, we’ve seen UDP Ministers camped out at Immigration offices across the country; and, we also notice that Minister of Natural Resources Hugo Patt has been giving out land left, right and center in areas where the UDP feels threatened. Here at the Belize Times, all we’ll say is please, Mr. Barrow, please call elections very soon. The people have had enough, and this one you can take to the bank – whenever elections are called, the UDP will be sent packing. No doubt about that at all.

Bad Vibes

We’d like to take this opportunity to offer free legal advice to the PM’s law partner, Rodwell, who can’t seem to figure out how to write a proper submission in a lawsuit being filed against our friends from Vibes Radio. We hear that the submission has been sent back for re-writing three times already. Of course, we’d be happy to help. It shouldn’t be rocket science for a lawyer with Rodwell’s experience, but we’ve noticed that he doesn’t exactly seem to be the sharpest tool in the shed for a while now. Still, he doesn’t need to be the most brilliant and brightest when he’s got a friend like Dean who makes sure that when those closed-door deals like the one done in Miami with the Lord take place the law firm gets a hefty piece of the pie. It’s good to have a friend like Dean.